greasoned seedlings, goys and burls!

FLASH: dog bites man!

click here for more details...

it's the new "gold"

can you say "camiseta roja"?

248,298 and counting!

will we reach 250,000 today? perhaps 'round midnight. thanks to all the fans of scrubs and sarah chalke, around the world. i had NO idea she was that popular. seriously popular.

"liege, 1980" -- DON'T SAY IT ! !

[click to enlarge, but read it to yourself, not aloud.]

regular readers will be familiar with my regular rants about how to many neophites overuse the word <<epic>> to include such non-descript events as one's morning poop or a regular bicycle training ride. although either might exceed one's nominal expectations of the day, neither should approach the limits of your capacities or the peripheries of your mental capabilities. now, it seems, the good people at pez have picked up my rant, and have given it an appropriate illustration that proves my point. so just because it snowed the other day, it snows EVERY fucking winter, doesn't it? and just because you ride your bike outside in the snow, STFU about the so-called "epic" nature of it, because if YOU say it's epic, it ain't.

and i con't care if you're lance fucking armstrong, it STILL ain't epic just because you say it is.

now, go out and ride your bicycle.

it's just another day . . .

only a little colder.

shortbus heckling training video released

this is how SERIOUSLY we take our heckling!

bikini cross, 2009!

[click on photo to enlarge]

* * * * *

if i had a nickel for everytime i said "you just GOTTA go to jingle cross," i'd be a fairly wealthy man.

but if i had a dime for every time someone said to me, "you know, you were RIGHT about what you said about going to jingle cross,"

i could afford to buy these women

"kim west radio cycling show"

racing bikinis!!

pearl

pearl dancing at burning man. she danced with friends every sunday morning; it was her spiritual thing. she was such a powerful being. things and people flourished because of her.

janna and her burning man bike; it was later painted white and permanently decorated with flowers and such. sadly, i never made it to the festival with her.

i first encountered and became entranced by this smile in junior high school. it never changed. i'm sure gonna miss this one.

. . . . .

life never gets easier, i've learned. the most one can hope for is to not be overwhelmed by what life throws your way. ironically, the very strength that pearl helped others discover within themselves was never fully accessible to pearl when she needed it most. she constantly pushed and tested her limits in her explorations of human despair, to better equip her to help others cope with theirs. it was not necessarily a noble undertaking, in her view. it was just what she did: she gave of herself to others. those who knew her were better as a result of that.

pearl

my friend pearl died monday; i learned of her death yesterday. i am struggling to put into words how i feel about this loss.

ahead of the curve

that's where i've always striven to stay. so with that as my guiding principle, watch this. and take notes. i tell ya, i'm ON to something that's gonna be BIG.

let's make THIS happen in des moines!!

check out this link to an insane ride--entirely within the portland city limits!
or watch THIS video from 2007, which gpickle tells me is BETTER!!

i hate qwest

Chat Transcript
info: Thank you for using Qwest.com. A Qwest Sales and Service Consultant will be with you in just a moment. Your account information is confidential and protected by law. Advise our agent if you prefer that we don't use it to market bundled services. This has no effect on the service or offers we provide for you.
info: Thank you for contacting Qwest. My name is Taylor B. How may I help you today?
kim west: i am unable to log into my account.
Taylor B: I apologize for the inconvenience.
Taylor B: I will be happy to assist you.
kim west: that's ok; not your fault.
Taylor B: What is the billing phone number on your account?
kim west: 515-XXX-XXXX
Taylor B: Thank you.
Taylor B: Just to verify that I am speaking with the responsible party on this account, please provide me with your Qwest Security Code.
kim west: hm?
Taylor B: It is a 12 character code Qwest issued to you.
Taylor B: If you are at the billing number now, I can have an automated call made to you with the security code or I would be happy to mail the security code to your billing address.
kim west: [reading from current bill] 515-XXX-XXXX-ZZZ
RTaylor B: That is your account number. The security code is a separate 12 character code.
kim west: yes...
Taylor B: Are you at that billing number now?
kim west: no; it's my fax line. where can i find it? i just want to pay my bills on line and avoid the most annoying automated voice mail system ever.
Taylor B: Well it should have been mailed to you when your service started. I would be happy to mail the security code to your billing address. In the meantime, if you call the billing department at 800-491-0118, they can take a payment over the phone.
kim west: i started using this number in 1994. i have already made the payment, i just want to get outside and do something else.
Taylor B: Okay. Unfortunately, I cannot access any account information without verifying a security code.
kim west: whatever. click.

the beauty of delusion: 3' passing laws

jane: "if we just had more laws to protect bicyclists, we could pedal our way right into nirvana."

dan: "jane, you ignorant slut."

ol' dan is right again. read here for today's proof that more laws don't protect bicyclsts; strict enforcement and uniform application do.

that, and an EFFECTIVE public awareness campaign about the policy of strict enforcement.

"no, really: we're just friends"

that's not completely true -- yet.

today, i became a "fan" of former governor and fellow-radio talk show host sarah palin. on facebook, anyway.

but soon, i hope to become an actual friend.

i think i have a lot to offer, in a friendship kind of way, and i think she is sharp enough to recognize that.

but time is of the essence.

the future of our democracy--our way of life--lies in the balance.

or some sort of shit like that.

wish me luck...

i'm going in!

answering THE age-old question:

a pie in the sky to soupy sales

nighthawks at the diner

"iggy; you call me iggy."
"look, i'm sorry i'm late, jim. boy, ooo, four-car pile-up. oof. i delivered a baby this morning about nine o'clock, i was saving lives; i was out there on the highway. it was, you know, there's nothing worse than roadside surgery..."

dick cheney was "incompetent war fighter" - general paul eaton, ret.

National Security Network Senior Adviser Gen. Paul Eaton (Ret.), who served more than 30 years in the United States Army and from 2003-2004 oversaw the training of the Iraqi military, responded to Dick Cheney's accusations on Afghanistan from last night:
"The record is clear: Dick Cheney and the Bush administration were incompetent war fighters. They ignored Afghanistan for 7 years with a crude approach to counter-insurgency warfare best illustrated by: 1. Deny it. 2. Ignore it. 3. Bomb it. While our intelligence agencies called the region the greatest threat to America, the Bush White House under-resourced our military efforts, shifted attention to Iraq, and failed to bring to justice the masterminds of September 11.
"The only time Cheney and his cabal of foreign policy 'experts' have anything to say is when they feel compelled to protect this failed legacy. While President Obama is tasked with cleaning up the considerable mess they left behind, they continue to defend torture or rewrite a legacy of indifference on Afghanistan. Simply put, Mr. Cheney sees history throughout extremely myopic and partisan eyes. "As one deeply invested in the Armed Forces of this country, I am grateful for the senior military commanders assigned to leading this fight and the men and women fighting on the ground. But I dismiss men like Cheney who inject partisan politics into the profound deliberations our Commander-in-Chief and commanders on the ground are having to develop a cohesive and comprehensive strategy, bringing to bear the economic and diplomatic as well as the military power, for Afghanistan -- something Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld never did.
"No human endeavor can be as profound as sending a nation's youth to war. I am very happy to see serious men and women working hard to get it right."

poster child

i hate cliches.

i hate it when a bicyclist is killed by a motorist.

i hate it even more when that motorist is not charged and held legally and morally accountable for that death.

i hate it even more when a culpable politician hides behind a cliche to cover the fact that he lacks balls and a spine.

egro, i hate it twice as much when two bicyclists die.

but imagine how i feel when when i read the continuing story about this unbelievable situation in san antonio and the entire state of texas.

here comes my cliche du jour:

fucking politicians

more music before bed