Friday, January 26, 2007

kerkove announces fixed-gear trans-iowa route

rock rapids, spencer, humboldt, hampton, cedar falls,
independence, dyersville, bellevue
what common trait do these eight villages share?
if you place a marble on the town square of each of these little burbs,
it will just stay there.
and you'll be able to see every other marble from your vantage.
no hills on the ragby this year.
to those who say that lance is "just a guy from texas who wants to do the ride like everyone else," and "doesn't want to take over your ride," i say bullshit.
just because the guy is fat, and has been reduced to running since swearing off the bike, NOW the powers at the register have decided to make it even EASIER for the swarms of dangerous riders [jimbo] to hang with him and further endanger the lives of those seasoned riders who know when to sit at the side of the road.
oh yeah, let the carnage begin.
* * * * *
today's quiz: how many beers can an old man carry while riding a fixie through a crowd of 10,000?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Au contraire most unholy one, I have it on good authority from at least three people, me, myself, and I, that the last day is certainly not flat, and to add the fun we found bovine escapees standing along the road at the bottom of a pretty good hill. Now if that doesn't get your adrenalin pumping nothin' will. I would like to know where the hell you got that photograph of the RAGBRAI director and myself (powers at the register)going over a map of the route, that is supposed to be double secret. We do have a plan for slowing Lance down, he will be captaining the Mabel Train. I also guarantee that if you have the entourage pictured on your site with you along the side of the road he will most definately stop for a cold one.
Re:quiz I'm not good with word problems, perhaps you could draw a picture.

Duffy one of the "powers at the Register"

the mostly reverend said...

i have my inside sources; i haven't been spending my years being a scallawag for nothing, you know!
well, actually, i have, as it pays rather poorly.

[by the way, we THINK we look like those girls.]

lost78 said...

The answer to that, as it seems to be to many things, is that it depends on what you're wearing: Not much room, a bit more in that chest hair, or a lot if you show up in a mouse costume.