Tuesday, August 21, 2007

remember ME?

who the hell AM i?
[click on my photo for a clue]
. . .
i'm patrick mchenry,
a wise-guy republican from north carolina,
the buckle of the nascar belt.
you might think by looking at me that i'm the weather guy at
w-ass, tv6 from raleigh. but in reality,
i'm the brilliant congressman who ridiculed the democratic party
for their insistence that the bicycle was a major component of solving the energy crisis.
i'm so smart that i joked that they were proposing
a "19th century solution to a 21st century problem."
well, guess what?
i am such an asshole now.
god, how can i show my face on the floor of congress, after i said this:
“A major component of the Democrats’ energy legislation and the Democrats’ answer to our energy crisis is, hold on, wait one minute, wait one minute, it is promoting the use of the bicycle.
Oh, I cannot make this stuff up. Yes, the American people have heard this. Their answer to our fuel crisis, the crisis at the pumps, is: Ride a bike.
Democrats believe that using taxpayer funds in this bill to the tune of $1 million a year should be devoted to the principle of: “Save energy, ride a bike.”
. . . . .
i am such a dumb ass.
man. good thing i'm from north carolina.
those rubes! hell, they elected me once.
what did dubya say?
i'll get re-elected.
you just watch.
fucking idiots.

3 comments:

Pete Basso said...

Even I have to admit, Bush is one of the worst speakers I've ever seen. It is painful to watch him speak. That is a pretty funny clip

the mostly reverend said...

a regular reader [well, regular in the sense that he reads this on a regular basis, but i have no knowledge regarding any other senses of the word "regular"] wrote to tell me:

"I shared the article with some friends who live in NC and I thought I would share their responses with you. It seems they have a better grip of the situation than those of us who live far from there.

"Maybe he is worried about the increased production of dangerous CO2 and its potential impact on healthier plants. After all, it is possible that increased bike utilization will lead to more CO2; which will produce more and stronger marijuana plants; which will decrease motivation and health; leading to more unemployment and more uninsured
individuals with health concerns; leading to higher reliance on government supported entitlement programs; finally resulting in tax increases. It is just so obvious."


"I am pretty sure that the campaign against bike riding begins with the very powerful and often aggressive unicycle lobby. Most people think they are just a bunch of clowns but, they scare the congress shitless."

this is stunning insight regarding life in the tar heel state, a state which has its own, official carniverous plant.
[i just thought they ate their own.]
thanks, mr. professor!

http://statelibrary.dcr.state.nc.us/NC/SYMBOLS/SYMBOLS.HTM#top

the mostly reverend said...

that link didn't copy properly.
try this one--it's worth it!

http://statelibrary.dcr.state.nc.us/NC/SYMBOLS/SYMBOLS.HTM#top