skip a meal, fat ass!

do me a favor, would ya?

next time you see me, ask me how my "skip a meal, fat ass" weight loss program is coming. i hung my sorry, fat ass out to dry this weekend, and these are the results: 1--saturday's altoona road race: dnf, 3 of 6? laps completed [1/2 a race]; 2--sunday's big creek road race: dnf, five [of eight] laps. note: this is 50+, NOT pro 1/2. okay?

i had HOPED to be ripplin' the skinsuits like this [this is me last june]. so help me, by asking. okay? i knew you would.

in other news: lots of great racing, with a smattering of bullshit. the 1/2s field was lively and spirited, both days. lots of smart riding, but too much unfair racing. with all the crosswinds, and mobile race officials, why aren't folks getting DQ'd for centerline violations? it wasn't hard to get lou and andy dq'd or relegated last year; is it just des moines teams who get kicked? word it that in the 1/2s field, tilford, et alia were on the WHITE line drilling for gold, while in the masters field, the boys from ames were playing loose with the yellow line in sunday's closing lap.

zebras: are we going to see any consistency? how about a big-name sacrificial lamb to set the tone early in the season? relegate tilford or eaton to show everyone that "playing fair" wins.

in the 3s field, the boys were schooled when a natural stop happened: THAT'S racing, kiddies, the way it's meant to be played.

@ ! # % $ ^ * & + # @

speaking of fat asses, here's something that might help yours. and it might help you win a trip to jamaica!!

@$#%(&%*@!$

and THIS WILL help your fat ass.